Friday, March 23, 2012

The sun is shining on my back. It is shining through the trees, over the mountains, through my deck onto my back as I sit and feed my baby. The aroma of a newly brewed cup of coffee fills my clean kitchen. I can hear the laughter, pounding little feet, and endless conversation leftover from yesterday when Charlie and Kate played for hours with their friends here. And I can't help but feel fully content with my life.
I do not always feel this way. Being a reflective person I am constantly wondering how I can be a better wife and mom. I am always trying to push myself out of my comfort zone and actually answer the phone when friends call. And I am trying to establish myself as a person outside of being a mom, which is no easy task.
Guiding children through various stages and phases has consumed me. C and K have gone through a tough phase of not getting along. The teasing, fighting, arguing has taken its toll on me. It is particularly tough for me because my brother and sister are my best friends and I really want that for my kids as well.
But in this moment with the bigs at school and the little just as cute and happy as ever, and the sun shining through my clean house, I feel content. And I am going to bottle that feeling for the rest of my long day.

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