Not so much.
It is hard to judge the age three based off this past week since he has had a fever, horrible cough and runny nose for a full week now. We are hoping that these past 7 days are more of a reflection of him being tired and feeling sick, rather than a new phase he is entering.
This morning was rough. hell, actually. He woke up after 10 hours a complete wreck. I have decided that there is nothing worse than waking up to a grumpy kid. He would cry for me to hold him, then demand I make him pancakes.
He couldn't understand that there was no baking powder and therefore no pancakes.
I WANT WAFFLES, sorry bud that takes baking powder too.
How about french toast I say in my sweetest voice. He yells back a yeh but then once again demands I hold him. Rounding the corner comes the sweetest, most cheerful little girl. She proudly says GOOD MORNING (first time I have ever heard her say it) and it melts my heart. But my happiness turns quickly into frustration as Charlie pushes his sister aside and once again demands, no sucks, my energy away. Kate is on the floor crying, Charlie is screaming.
What is a mom to do. Really.
When I explained to my own mom how frustrated adam and I were this morning with our monster, I mean son, she calmly stated: You know Sarah in those moments you need to be at your best. Charie needs you more than ever when his little world is falling apart.
She is dead on. And how does one muster out the smile, and calm ways when what they want to do is scream.
LEAVE ME ALONE!
Adam tries to help but the kids don't want him, they want their mom. I can't, really I can't hold both kids while making french toast at the same time.
So I am left to think about it. Think about why in those situations when everyone is out of sorts, when everyone wakes up grumpy (except little kate) can't I just suck it up and give everyone what they need. Adam here is your coffee sweetheart, Charlie let me hold you with my right arm and make your french toast with my left. Kate lets read a book together on the couch while my go go gadget arm stretches into the kitchen to flip the french toast.
So yeh. 3 has been hard. When I run into other parents at the park they tell me 2 was easy but 3 was challenging. I hope that isn't the case for me.
I love Charlie's stubborn ways, his energy, his zest for life. I don't like the pushing and hitting, I don't like the yelling, crying, and screaming.
But I should add that this extreme behaviour is very new, as in the last week, and it is true that he has been sick, waking up at night coughing, and not eating as well as usual. And when I am sick I am cranky.
So note to self: this is my career. I will be paid in healthy, happy, wholesome children, and a family unit that wants to work together, play together, and be together. My job isn't always about playing at the park, playing soccer in the backyard, or walking along the beach. It must also be about holding your son when he is sick rather than making 24 cupcakes (sidenote...my cupcakes are the bomb), finding a way to make breakfast while holding one or two kids, showing Charlie love and understanding when all I want to do is run and hide.
For I am his sun. Adam and I are the center of his universe and our job is give him warmth, strength, and constant love so that he can grow.
This is what I do. I mother, I cook, I clean, I play, I read, I change diapers, I get mad and forgive myself, I collect myself, I think before I talk, but mostly I love...my family, and also myself.
As I raise my half glass of wine (yes both kids are napping, this morning was hard, including showing up to a doc appointment 5 hours early and then having to cancel...so yes for the first time in a long time I am treating myself to a short glass of wine) to the next 55 weeks. I raise my glass to living and learning.
5 comments:
You're a great mom, but there are only 52 weeks in a year.
oh damn not 56...my bad
Ya, I started second guessing myself there...52? or 56? Well, my experience is that each year gets a little more challenging. Hopefully that's not your experience. However, I have heard that rowdy boys tend to calm down a little come school age....maybe. I'll keep my fingers crossed for that one. All I have to say is that you are one of the most patient moms I know.
what an amazing post. you are doing a wonderful job.
i have the perfect solution for one-handed pancake making (do it almost every morning): cherrybrook farms gluten free pancake mix. it's not what you think (i discovered while battling lea's eczema) but it is the best pancake mix out there. so fluffy so easy. charlie can mix it (just add milk). i also add peanut butter and jelly or bananas/blueberries/nutella, whatever. it's the bomb. you can get it at newleaf. i promise he will love it.
three will be a good year. cherish it, can you imagine him at four??? practically a grown man. i raise my odouls with you, through thick and thin, sun and clouds, hitting and hugging, butter and plant sugar.
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