December: Baking

Winter is a hard time to be pregnant. With all the baking, friends bringing over gifts of cookies and breads, and desserts to be had, how can one formally fit girl stay that way while also growing another child.
Throw in many rainy and cold days and you get lots of baking.

One morning while working out at FIT I got the idea of making a gingerbread house from scratch, so not my normal cup of tea. I swear the most random things pop into my mind while spinning or lifting weights.
I picked the kids up from the gym childcare and whisked them off to new leaf. They were all smiles when I explained our project for the day, and the copious amounts of candy we would need to buy from the bulk section. They were on board and eager to help.

After making the dough, letting it chill, rolling it out, letting it chill, cutting out the shapes, baking them, letting them cool, making the frosting and carefully attaching each part, waiting for it to dry and solidify, and then attaching the roof, and finally "decorating" it, I was practically in tears and definitely dropping F bombs left and right (something I have until that point in my mothering life drastically cut down on)
In fact Charlie actually said to me: "So mommy...when you make gingerbread houses it is ok to use the f*$% word.
All in all it was a day long project that the kids LOVED, I grew to hate....

Charlie looks so big in this pic....

Kate, well Kate is Kate...really feeling the flow of the dough

Until it was fully consumed Charlie would say, "Mommy I love your beautiful gingerbread house" every time he saw it, which was all day long. E

We also made the most delicious cookies ever. Peppermint bark Chocolate....YUM!

We made the traditional Christmas cookies, and as always the kids were focused, had fun, and did a great job!

We are officially on a sugar detox in this family. Charlie wakes up every morning and cries: We haven't had candy or cookies in so long.....actually sweetie we are just finishing up our first full week of no crap. From now on it is healthy scones, granola bars, and muffins....with all the baking and testing I have done this month it is a miracle I am still in my everyday clothes and haven't hit up the pile of maternity pants donated to me

The things they say...

Situation 1:

Adam was talking to Charlie about his upcoming trip to Nonnie's house. Adam said to Charlie that he might get to see Santa at Gilroy Gardens.

Charlie: "I like that Jolly Old Elf!"

Situation 2:

We have been taking night walks a few times a week. The kids and I get bundled up and walk into the cold, rainy night. We leave Adam at home cuddled up to his ipad. Every time we venture into the night I hear things like: "Mommy, we are so lucky...most people are sleeping, but here we are walking outside!" Of course it is 6:30 but I nod...yes honey you are so lucky because most people are already in bed. Two nights ago we were walking admiring all the xmas lights and we came across a strange large santa...very large. I said, "Hmmm Santa looks wierd."

Kate: "Don't worry mommy. He is just a big dude."

Next one:

A few weeks ago my dad injured his back attempting to break up a fight at the ranch (where he works). He was telling me the entire story and at the end Kate said, "Pa...did you get your gun and shoot them?" I guess you had to be there. My dad works at a rehabilitation facility for troubled men....but he does not carry a gun. We got a good laugh.

Next one:

Charlie; "Hey daddy...Fuck and Duck rhyme."

Adam: Taking a deep breath and trying hard not to break into a laugh "Yes, charlie they do rhyme, can you find another work that rhymes with duck..."

They say the most incredibly funny things daily, but my mind isn't as sharp as it usually is. I forget everything lately....which is a shame....

Random Ramblings

I think things are good now. For the most part. I knew I would get through the last few months, and that as my energy and health came back so would my patience and usually positive attitude.
I'm 16 weeks and love this new little baby floating around inside me...I still feel tired and sick to my stomach, but am getting so much better.
How I survived the past 10 weeks, kept my family fed, house clean (kind of) and kids happy and out of trouble, and managed to take on a new job...is beyond me. I really did wake up and dread each day. On top of it my mom got a brand new puppy. An adorable, well-behaved chocolate lab....but still a puppy with sharp teeth. So sending my kids downstairs in times of need became tricky. And playing in the backyard became almost impossible. This baby better be amazing in every way, because puking up to 8 times a day with two young kids sucked. The fridge became my worst enemy. I could be sitting on the couch and someone would open the fridge and the smell would send me racing to the toilet. On top of that all Charlie had a very very difficult month or so. Tantrums, incredibly sensitive, attitude, you name it...he had it. Now looking back I realize that he was probably picking up on being inside more, and seeing his normally happy mommy not looking so good.
I tried to tell myself it was all a stage, and deep inside I knew that everything I was feeling and going through was temporary, but in the day to day living...that advice doesn't help. I felt out of control. Emotional. Tired. Lost. And sad that my normally sweet son was slipping away.
The good news is that we are coming out on the other side. I have more and more energy. Haven't thrown up for 5 days, and Charlie is back to his charismatic, sweet, funny, lovable self.
I am really proud of him. Of the way he can make a mistake and apologize on his own, how he can think of solutions to make something better, how he can come up to me and give me a hug asking to "make up"
And I am proud of Adam and myself. We were at a total loss, and I started to find myself trying to put him in his room, threatening to take toys away, yelling, and crying. That is not me, and not the way I want to parent. I was able to step back after a week of trying these more conventional methods of discipline and realize that they didn't work with my son. I needed to have empathy, compassion, patience. I needed to overlook the little behaviors, but draw the line in the sand for the more offensive behaviors. Who knows why or how things went back to normal. All I know is that I am happy my connection to my son has returned. I adore him and all his incredibly cute and cool mannerisms.
And he has been sleeping all night alone in his bed. Just waking up once to pee and asking for a quick kiss and hug in the night.
It is good to be sleeping in my own bed all night.
And Kate. Wow, what a character.
Still sporting tights and boots with a great smile. She actually has added a new layer to her look, her swimsuit on top of her tights. sweet. Today before her nap she said over and over again: "You think I am going to nap?......."NO" with as much sauciness as anyone can ever have.
Her bangs are growing, and I just love watching her push her hair back. Still won't let us comb it or style it. but hey it is growing.
She loves Lily and Henry as much as a little girl can love anything. She cherishes her "special time" with me while Charlie is at nursery school, and truly there is no one I would rather sit down and play with than my sweet Kate.
She yells at the universe (or one of us) but quickly says, "I'm yorry" and moves right on. She says things like, "good night poppy head pa" And I love her for it. She insists on doing everything herself, even if it takes her 10 good minutes to get into her carseat and buckle herself in.
She can't wait to be a big sister but tells me everyday that she is still a baby. She has made her way back into our bed all night every night, and I love it. I snuggle up to her all night and don't mind because I know in just a few more months she won't be my baby anymore.
She reads for hours a day, either in some weird language, and a pretty accurate retelling of a book. And this little girl loves her dolls.
Every morning I lay in bed until 7 or 730 with these two incredible kids. We snuggle, giggle, talk about our dreams, the day ahead of us. We sing, play tickle fights, and just wake up together. This morning I looked at both of their beautiful faces and felt overwhelmed with love for them. I felt so excited for welcoming another baby Berkowitz into this family. What a lucky baby to be born and right away have two creative, sweet, fun siblings.
I hope to recharge my camera and capture some shots of my kids...afterall it has been over a month since I have snapped a non-phone pics.
Hope everyone is doing well!

Halloween carving

The kids really enjoyed carving a pumpkin this year. Like all their little jobs they do, they took it very seriously and watched Adam very carefully until it was their turn to participate.

First we went outside to pick out our perfect pumpkin. We played at 5 different pumpkin farms in the past month and therefore had quite a few pumpkins to choose from. Charlie grabbed the biggest one down by the strawberry bale and carried it up the stairs to the front door all by himself.

First the carving team talked about what kind of pumpkin they wanted to create. Of course Kate insisted on a "happy pumpkin" while Charlie really wanted a "scary one". Adam was the deciding vote.

I love how Charlie's arm is wrapped around Adam's, so sweet.

After the top was cut off both Kate and Char took turns taking out the guts. Charlie was successful on his first attempt....

Kate on the other hand had a bit of a harder time...

After failing at grabbing the guts, she looked at me for a little support.

Then decided to stand up and give it another try...

And came up with a tiny amount of pumpkin innards...from then on we gave Kate the job of separating pumpkin seeds, and Charlie the job of digging out the pumpkin.

The finished product:

I love this time of year....

As you know dress up is a huge pass time at our house. The kids dress up everyday, so actually choosing one thing to be for the Halloween parade at Los Ninos and the actual night of trick or treating was hard, and there was quite a lot of last minute sharing going on.

First up: Los Ninos Parade. The morning of Kate's nursery school day she was undecided on what to be. She put on her lion costume, no go. We tried her fairy princess super girl outfit, no such luck. It was no surprise to us since getting her dressed any ordinary day is difficult. Finally, Charlie suggested she borrow his batman costume, and her face lit up! She was the most adorable bat girl I have ever seen.

Kate's nursery school class is small and cute. There are 7 kids total and everyone is 3, except Kate. She has been dropping off and picking up Charlie for a full year, and so walks around like she owns the place. All of her teachers got a kick out of her costume....because the other girls were princesses, a cat, and a pumpkin. Kate was the only super hero in the bunch, obviously because she has an older brother.

The tradition at LN is to have a small party (snack time with costumes on) and then walk around the wonderful yard in the halloween parade.

Here are the cuties getting ready!

Batgirl's brother and dad getting ready to cheer her on. (love that adam works so close to our lives that he can steal away for a few minutes for these types of things)

Maybe the helicopter and dragon are intimidated by the strong batgirl in between them?

She took this parade thing very seriously, allowing stoping once to flex her muscles..

So slow that she is getting lapped, but hey when you are on the look out for crime you have to be thorough.

Friday afternoon it was Charlie's turn to have his Halloween parade. The class is 3 times bigger... can you find him?

Like Kate he took his job seriously. The other kids were being silly, falling over, running...Charlie just kept on marching with a straight face.

Charlie and his best buds Ian and Basel. Personally I like the shot of them all in snow white costumes better....

The kids had great fun cheering each other on, and I was so proud of Charlie for thinking to offer Kate his costume and for sharing it. These nursery school parades were part 1 of celebrations.

The things they say...

Ok, I know I am lagging on this blog. I am not sure if I have ever taken a three week break before. But growing a baby is freaking hard work, and what little energy I have left has to go to my two children, tutoring, and teaching, leaving no time for something as silly as a blog.

BUT....

with the kids doing so much, saying such great things, and me growing and changing as a mom everyday it is odd that I am not posting, because truly there is so much to say.

But for today I will stick to funny things:

Funny thing #1:

A few weeks ago at swim class a little boy just under 3 ran up to Kate while she was in the shower and he roughed her up a bit, then minutes later he ran back over and for no reason yelled, SHUT UP to her. I wasn't the least bit surprised because well, kids do random things. Well, Kate did what any normal little person would, she smacked him in the chest. Of course it wasn't my proudest moment, but if your kid yells at my daughter and gets in her face, chances are her, she will stick up for herself....by hitting.

So about an hour later right before nap I put her on the potty and said, "Kate, remember how G grabbed your tummy and yelled shut up at you? That made you mad. I understand why. But we really can't hit people, it hurts?"

With her adorable little body parked on the toilet she looked up at me with her big blue eyes and said, "How bout we don't talk about it right now?" I said, "fair enough" After all she was trying to poop.

Funny thing #2:

I took the kids to the park one afternoon after Charlie's nursery school. Charlie was playing with his new girl crush M, and I was meeting her father. A few minutes later my dad drove by and decided to stop by and come into the park to watch the kids play (as if seeing them and playing with them daily isn't enough for him...cute dad). Charlie looks at Pa, smiles, and then walks right past little M's dad and says so causally while pointing over his shoulder, "that guy lives with me"

Funny thing #3:

Yesterday I turned 11 weeks and had my first good day in 6 weeks. I woke up, shot off a million rocket balloons, made play-dough with the kids, then we made cookies, then we went bike riding, to the park, and out for Gelato. All by 12. Then we went back to the park, and after that Charlie played with all his friends at Nursery School. On the way to nursery school Charlie asked if it was getting to be night time. I explained that even though we had done so much, and had such a great time, we still had 6 hours of fun left in our day. He replied, "Ok, I think I am going to use up the rest of my energy at Los Ninos."

After dinner he was talking with Adam. Adam asked him how his day was, Charlie answered,

"It wasn't a magical day." to which Adam said "No?" Charlie replied, "No, it is not like I saw any rabbits coming out of any hats..."

So I guess that is what it will take for me to create a magical day for my boy

Funny thing #4

Charlie, Kate and I were picking out bedtime books. Kate looked at Charlie's hand and said, "Charlie got a pinter (splinter) on his thernar eminence. The last time I heard her say that many weeks ago when charlie painted pretend blood on his thumb. This little girl will accomplish anything she sets her mind to. She knows many medical names for body parts, and has been asking me to teach her spanish. The other night for her 10th song she asked me to sing twinkle twinkle in Spanish. I tried to fool her by singing the itsy bitsy spider in spanish because I don't know how to sing twinkle twinkle in spanish. I even tried to put it to the tune of twinkle twinkle...but I am not too musical. She loved the song, but when I was done she looked me dead in the eye and said, "That wasn't twinkle twinkle in panish."

Funny thing #5

When kate messes something up, spills, or has any kind of unfortunate accident she says, "OH SHIT" The first few times Adam cracked up and asked her over and over: what did you say. Can you say a little reinforcement ADAM! Charlie doesn't say it, and I try my hardest not to swear (out loud at least). After the initial cuteness wore off (ok, it never will with her high pitched squeaky voice), we tried to correct her saying, "Oh shoot" Most of the time now she says "oh shoot" but last night she spilled her water on Charlie's bed and said "Oh shit" I calmly said, "you mean oh shoot" She said, "No, I mean oh shit" I get it though. There is a time a place for a word like shit, like when you stub your little toe on the corner of a wall...or.....spill water on your big brother's bed...she is a fast learner.

Funny thing #6

Let's preface this by saying I am officially stumped by age 4. I have loved every stage up until now, and having days like yesterday and today I can honestly say that there are many many many wonderful things about a four year old boy. Like how curious he is, the questions he asks (mommy what is stronger metal or a house? What if the house was on top of a hill and then rolled all the way down), the way he can play for up to an hour with k so wonderfully, switching between playing babies and superheroes. But the attitude, sensitivity, meltdowns are like nothing I have ever experienced before. And the things I hear him saying (along with other 4 year old boys) "I don't want to play with you" "You are not my friend". After going to the park with Nonnie and Charlie telling some random boy that he wasn't his friend, my mom had a conversation with Charlie. Charlie told my mom plainly, "Mama, I can't be friends with everyone." I thought it was a great answer. He is quite popular at preschool, and really we can't be friends with everyone...

Funny thing #7

A few days ago K hit right below her eye really hard on the corner of a picnic table while on her balance bike. My mom asked her last night, "Kate how did you get your black eye?" Kate said so matter of factly: "No, look in my eye. (she opened her eyes super big and pointed to her pupil), it got a lot of blue in there." Guess she doesn't know what a black eye is.

These kids aren't obedient. Not the best listeners. Not great at owning up to their mistakes. But they adorable, funny, spunky, strong, sweet, and very real little people. And I am proud to be their mommy.

The things they say

I have not been getting up in the morning for obvious reasons, and let's just say Adam is no morning person, which leaves the kids running around wild for the first hour of the day. A few days ago I overheard this from the playroom:

Charlie: KATE!!!!!!! AW you just blessed you on me

Kate: I yorry

Last night I made my way into Charlie's bed at some point in the night and a few hours later he woke up crying, from a nightmare...

Charlie: NO, Kate is eating all the gorilla balls

Being the middle of the night it took me a minute to think about what he was talking about. The mental image in my head was not pretty. But then I quickly remembered he was talking about a cereal he likes to eat.

A few days ago Charlie was having a tough moment. He was upset about something and yelling at us. Adam asked him repeatedly in a nice voice to either calm down or leave the room. When Charlie wouldn't do either, Adam got up and walked towards him raising his own voice a bit.

Charlie: (face full of tears and red) Daddy, remember the golden rule!

We have been working with him on not loosing his cool and yelling so much when he is upset. My mom has been talking to him about the golden rule, treat others as you want to be treated. So when he felt like his dad was yelling at him, he wisely pointed out that Daddy should treat others as he wants to be treated.

About a month ago people, including myself, began asking the kids what they wanted to be for Halloween.

Kate's answer for a solid month: A BUTT, and then she breaks into a crazy belly roar. She thought of this idea all on her own. Thankfully about a week ago she changed her mind, after one day of proclaiming that she wants to be a butthead, she moved on to a fairy.

This past weekend Adam was a champ. It has been a real struggle for me to make it through the day, let alone work a few hours and parent my energetic kids. Saturday Adam gave me the entire day off and took the kids on a bike ride to Hatch school. Charlie is usually very good about stopping at stop signs and looking both ways. As they were approaching a street Adam reminded Charlie to stop and look both ways before crossing the street. Charlie did not look both ways, but instead rode out in the middle of the street.

Adam: Charlie, you didn't look both ways you could have been hit by a car.

Charlie: I don't know what to tell ya....

They say laughter is the best medicine....